moneymcbags (< 20)

5/14/10 Midafternoon Report: Market loses again but Nets and Knicks still said to be interested

May 14, 2010 – Comments (1) | RELATED TICKERS: IBKR , DFZ , NVD

Oh sh*t, the market sunk today like Bernie Madoff's grandchildren's hopes and dreams or like a booze cruise captained by Joseph Hazelwood.  Just when you thought investors had forgotten about Greece like John Edwards forgot about dignity (though perhaps he never had any) or Britney Spears forgot about underwear, it is back in the news bringing down the Euro.  Fears remain that Greece won't be able to service its debt (and it won't, unless perhaps Julia Alexandratou does the servicing), that the Euro may be doomed (is everyone else riding out EUO with Money McBags?), and that Nia Vardalos will finally make a sequel to My Big Fat Greek Wedding.  Making matters worse are that Sony warned that they may suffer a “significant impact” if Europe’s deficit spreads, Chinese Premier Wen Jiabao said the foundations for a worldwide recovery aren’t “solid” thanks to the continuing debt crisis and the foundations being made out of tofu (and not extra firm tofu, but the regular mushy sh*t) and paper (the paper of course being the dying Euro), and Hannah Hilton still remains "retired."  Things are looking so bleak today that even the cheering of Alison Preston likely won't cure the markets (though Money McBags would still like to put his rah in her sis-boom-bah).  One way to stop the debt contagion from spreading is to go all Weimar Republic and inflate the sh*t out of the Euro, another is to break up the EU and stop rewarding moral hazard which seems to be at what Gremany is now hinting.  Breaking up the EU would not only allow Germany and its strong economy to avoid taxing its workers in order to save its freespending neighbors, but it would also allow Germans to practice their favorite past time of schadenfreude.  It is scary out there today so take a deep breath and start booking your vacation to Paris because the Louvre is getting cheaper by the day.

In the US, the banking sector is taken a beating like it's 1986 and it just walked up to Mike Tyson and told him he talks like girl.  Politicians finally seem to want to try to regulate the industry that gave poor people loans in order to sell those loans off to greedy rich people not paying attention and thus destroy the global economy.  First off, credit card companies are taking it in the first bucket today (that was for all you credit card analysts out there) as the Senate voted on legislation to limit interchange fees.  AXP, COF, MA, and V are all down 5% to 10% as a key source of their revenue appears to be drying up like Soul Glo-less jheri curls.  Not only are politicians going after card issuers, but they are trying to fix the rating agencies by creating a middleman (or lucky pierre if you will) to determine who will rate bonds.  This is a bassackward solution, but still better than having rating agencies bid for business and thus completely take objectivity out of just a little something called objectively rating f*cking bonds.  First of all, Money McBags doesn't know why any bonds need third party ratings.  Investors should just do their f*cking work themselves or rely on the sellside or f*cking Yelp.com for all Money McBags cares.  Most importantly though, the current system is more screwed up than Oedipus' sex life or Tori Spellings' face, so Money McBags applauds the baby f*cking steps politicians are taking but it's a bit like showering before you bone a hooker because at the end of the day you're still going to get herpes.  Finally, the SEC and NYAG are still going after banks who may have lied to ratings agencies about what they were actually putting in CDOs.  Look, Money McBags has said this before, but they were all f*cking complicit.  Honestly, it would take about 3 minutes going through e-mails to convict every bank and every ratings agency of screwing the consumer like the consumer was walking home and hitched a ride on the the Bang Bus.  It was a big shell game only the shell was the global economy and the game was gay chicken and no one flinched so we're all left with flacid c*ck in our hands.  Be very wary of the financials space right now because if the government wants to be serious and prosecute, there will be no winners, like a Wilford Brimley-Kathy Bates sex tape.

As for macro news, US consumer sentiment was up in May and inline with analyst guesses as the average US consumer can't find Canada on a map, much less Greece, so it just proves that ignorance, and Madelyn Marie, are truly bliss.  Also retail sales rose by .4% which...READ MORE...