11.10.09 - Don't panic folks, let me explain!
October 28, 2009
– Comments (20) |
RELATED TICKERS: GME
Alstry has brought another auspicious number to our attention, no doubt a brilliant vision which bubbled up through his neurons - only visible to Alstry due to his intense devotion to posting google news reports of unemployment on CAPS three times a day.
That number is 9.09!
Er, no.. it isn't 9.09 - nothing drastic HAPPENED in all of September, and the market continued to rise to DOW 10,000. 9.09 was just a red herring - a false prediction purposely blogged about by Alstry for many months to through off the critics and unbelievers in Alstrynomics. Hope you were in on that one, and didn't throw away your life savings by following those half crazy.. I mean brilliant blog postings about 9.09. Hopefully you didn't short the market, invest in handguns, cat food, or underground bunker companies. Besides, whatever google news stories appeared during 9.09 were the real 9.09. And now YOU KNOW.
That the real number is 11.10.09!!!
Yes!
This one is really the date that is meaningful!
He didn't just use 11.10.09 because it was an arbitrary number in descending order!!
Ok, now let me explain whats been bubbling through his neurons...
1) Things are going to be bad. Really really bad. So bad everything good will be bad, and 3/4 people will be unemployed, dead, or a zombienomic zombulator. That's how bad.
2) You have to prepare. He says that in like 9000 of his 18000 blogs. Really, whatever you do, prepare for the vague crisis and doom. He's not saying you should sell stocks or buy goats. Just prepare. Just sayin.. you better prepare. Not telling you how to prepare... but YOU BETTER PREPARE! Run in circles! Japanese firedrills! Duck and coveR!
3) What better way to prepare, if you are unemployed and can blog 3 times a day, than by sitting around and playing Call of Duty. Yes. This battle game will teach you how to defend yourself against zombies and protect the ones you love. This may include the CEO homebuilder who is your best friend, or your buddy in the treasury department who is always visiting and letting you inside story, because you are Alstry. But... how can you get Call of Duty, if you are already unemployed and zombulated???
11.10.09
That's how.
From news.google.com:
"Entering the "Surprize Attack" sweepstakes is simple. Fans can pre-order the
game at any local GameStop or online at www.gamestop.com and use their receipt
code or online order confirmation number to enter. The code can be entered up to
twice a day before 11:10:09 a.m. and 11:10:09 p.m. CT on the "Surprize Attack"
website, www.surprizeattack.com, for a chance to win prizes in 80 random
drawings. Consumers can also opt-in to the Task Force 141 mobile game forimpromptu missions and more chances to win. "
Other prizes that you also need to win, to be prepared include:
* Tricked-out Hummer H2
* Ducati Hypermotard 1100 motorcycle
* Zodiac inflatable boat
* 100,000 rubles (approximately $3,300 USD)
* Polaris snowmobile
* Night vision goggles
* Laser range finders
* Smart phones
* Autographed artwork
* Binoculars
* Exclusive Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 branded wearables
These are the items you need on 11.10.09 to survive the zombies.
---
There. Descent into chaos -> Need to prepare -> Call of Duty -> 11.10.09
It all makes sense.
He's not just a random spout of noise and news.google.com reports on unemployment.
Really.
-Rof