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David in Qatar is an Idiot, a Jerk, and a Troll



November 21, 2009 – Comments (31)

Guilty as charged :)

I enjoy a good back and forth. Some people don't. They are free to ignore me and move on. There's something very important I would like to say to all my readers, both those I consider friends and those who can't stand me:

I didn't come here for you.

I am here on CAPS, blogging away, usually about economics, occasionally about investments, and sometimes about politics, because I want to. I enjoy it. I enjoy debating. Sometimes I cross the line, get a person all riled up, and suffer the backlash. It's not the end of the world. When it's over, it's over. I could sit down and buy a beer for anybody on this site with no hard feelings, even the ones that have given me the most vicious back and forth. Don't let me get to ya. It only feeds the beast :)

I am a selfish blogger. You should be too..

I blog about the things I care about, not the things you care about. On your "My Caps" page, there is a link that says "Create New Post." If you want more investing commentary on this website, click that button and type up a post. What kind of loser complains about the content of a user-controlled site, and then doesn't do anything about it? Pretty stupid isn't it? I comment on posts about topics I care about. If you write about those topics on a public forum like this, where you and I have equal access to your post, I will probably stop by. I might say hello, introduce myself, and discuss the issue politely. Then again, I might not. That's my prerogative.

Your mom thinks you're cool. I don't.

Mr. Burns: I specifically said no nerds.

Milhouse: My mom thinks I'm cool.

My arrogance is part of my nature. I am intimidated by no one, nor impressed by any particular perceived social standing. Accomplishments are interesting. I met a guy once that saved the lives of hundreds of Marines in Iraq in the early part of the war. He was an IT geek that found a flaw in the Army's handling of real time battle information that almost led them to call-for-fire on a Marine unit in front of them. That was pretty cool. Those Marines were about 5 minutes away from being shelled into a pulp. I know a lot of guys with cool stories. I feel cool just knowing them. I don't care if you think I'm cool. And I sure as hell don't care if you think I'm smart. The people I love think I'm an idiot, why should you be any different?

Want to hear a funny story?

Response: "How bout this? You tell me the story, David, and I'll tell you if it's funny."

In March 2000, President Clinton was visiting Islamabad, Pakistan to have a face-to-face with Musharaaf, the military dictator that overthrew Sharif (long story short: Sharif tried to kill Musharaaf , literally. The Army turned on Sharif, and the people supported the Army because Sharif was the most corrupt piece of garbage you've ever seen. They cheered martial law.)

Anyway, I was working at the American Embassy in Islamabad at the time. The Secret Service is quite friendly to Marines (they recruit heavily from them.) They set up a meet and greet in the conference room where Slick Willie was staying.

So we get in the armored car and drive down to the hotel. Along the way, there is a huge banner along one side of the road. It reads, "Welcome, Bil" (yes, they misspelled the President's name) and a Pakistani local is squatting next to it taking a dump in the middle of broad daylight. They do that every now and then. It's pretty disgusting but it's their country so it's best to just try to ignore it. They'll squat down next to your car in the parking lot and let loose if you don't watch out.

We get to the hotel and myself and about 5 other Marines head into the conference room. There is the mayor of Islamabad, some fancy businessmen-types, and a few politicians, and us. We stand out like a milk dot in an ink bowl.

Let's back up a bit. In late 1999, there was a coordinated mortar attack on Western interests in Islamabad. The Embassy was hit (no injuries) and a few other places like the World Bank Office. About the only person seriously wounded was a Pakistani that was working perimeter security at one of the targeted buildings.

He is also present at this little gathering, with his translator. He's on crutches, has the cast, the withered look of suffering through debilitating pain. It's a fine performance. Ocar worthy.

Into the room storms Madeline Albright, Clinton's SecState. (She's the one that said starving Iraqi children through sanctions was worth it if it crumbled Saddam's power. She's a sick person.) She loved Marines (and why wouldn't she? We enabled parasites like her to carry out their psychological aberrations on foreign soils.)

After giving us a few handshakes and photo ops, she comes across our stricken Pakistani comrade. The exchange was memorable.

Albright: "What happened to you?"

Translator : "He was injured in the bombing last year."

Albright: "Aw, you hurt yourself."

And that's it. She abruptly turned and walked away. The translator didn't need to explain that one. Very funny. The one thing about government tax feeders is that they are the kings and queens of shoveling B.S. If you're going to try and B.S. them (like pretending to be permanently injured in hopes of a pity pension), you need to bring your A game.

I never wanted recs, but 3000 is nice

I appreciate the support I've received from fellow liberty lovers on this site. It's a great feeling and a completely unexpected outcome. I had never written in a public forum before. If I'm a troll, then I'm the best damn troll in CAPS history (ok, maybe alstry has me beat). I've received 3000 recs while discussing such entertaining topics as the nature of money, free market fundamentals, central banking, and more. Who would have thought? If I decide to call it quits, this experience will always be a part of my life. I can't thank you guys properly.

A Happy Wife Is A Happy Life

No matter what happens here, or how repulsive you find me (join the club), the really important stuff is how you treat the people that love you. As long as their happy, what difference does it make that I called you an idiot on a random CAPS blog in cyberspace? Well, that's how I look at it. Every time someone calls me a mountain of arrogance (agreed) or an idiot three times in one comment (agreed, but I think we all get the point after two times), I think about the woman I love. She'd agree with everyone calling me an idiot, and she still finds a way to love me. So it's all good, friends.

David in Qatar

31 Comments – Post Your Own

#1) On November 21, 2009 at 12:26 AM, APJ4RealHoldings (40.61) wrote:

I wont rec due to the namecalling in your title

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#2) On November 21, 2009 at 12:44 AM, ease1 (97.11) wrote:

Right on man..  I don't always agree, but that's what makes it fun.  +100 if I could.

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#3) On November 21, 2009 at 12:52 AM, sleepreading (< 20) wrote:

My mom says the only reason you make fun of yourself is because you're jealous...

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#4) On November 21, 2009 at 1:07 AM, DarthMaul09 (29.05) wrote:

Excellent perspective.  Basically, don't sweat the small stuff.

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#5) On November 21, 2009 at 1:12 AM, catoismymotor (< 20) wrote:

You're also ugly and your mother dresses you funny. :)

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#6) On November 21, 2009 at 4:57 AM, whereaminow (< 20) wrote:

CAPS Moderators,

Just in case you aren't familiar with me =D, I'm attacking myself in the blog title, so I hope that doesn't get me in trouble with the CAPS forum policy prohibiting personal attacks.

David in Qatar

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#7) On November 21, 2009 at 9:14 AM, BravoBevo (99.97) wrote:

+1. Thanks for the story.

I think about the woman I love. It was after my first 5 years (or was it 10?) of marriage to my wife (who's the eldest of 5 kids, and the gosh-darn stubbonest) when I (an only child and being the independent type) realized that most of our arguments were akin to USA and USSR pointing ICBMs at each other.

Whenever I would nuke her, I'd get nuked right back (picture the "big board" from the movie "WarGames" made by Matthew Broderick when he was 20 years old). That's where I finally learned detente ...if I let her slide on some things (and don't call her out) then she'll let me slide on some things. And that has been one of the underpinnings that's allowed both of us to survive our marriage. Heh heh.

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#8) On November 21, 2009 at 9:26 AM, DaretothREdux (50.88) wrote:


I don't care what anyone says. You are a wise man. I hope to some day be half as wise.


I was going to insult you...but Cato beat me to it...and I got out plenty of sarcastic comments yesterday. I have the comfort of knowing that I can always make myself laugh.


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#9) On November 21, 2009 at 10:19 AM, BravoBevo (99.97) wrote:

For anyone who doesn't know what David is talking about because you missed the slap fight, I found a video recreation of it here -->


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#10) On November 21, 2009 at 10:49 AM, whereaminow (< 20) wrote:


ROFL, very nice! Yeah that slap fight pretty much sums it up.  My fiance would be so ashamed.

I feel like Ron Burgundy shortly after the newscaster fight scene.

Me: "Boy that escalated quickly.  Dare killed a guy."

Dare: "Yeah, there was a man on fire and I stabbed a guy in the heart with a trident."

Me: "I've been meaning to talk to you about that.  You should probably lay low for a while - find yourself a safehouse because you are probably wanted for murder.  I'm proud of you guys."

David in Qatar

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#11) On November 21, 2009 at 10:52 AM, Teacherman1 (< 20) wrote:

Thanks for the "college humor" link Bravo.

Lots of funny stuff there and so much better than the "blog slap fights".

Have a nice day.

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#12) On November 21, 2009 at 11:22 AM, kdakota630 (29.06) wrote:


a) please continue to post as you'd like as Top Fool.

b) thanks for the first link.  I started reading that blog but hadn't realized how the conversation had turned and didn't really know what this blog was refering to.

c) regarding your other link, WTF?!?


Please keep up the great work with your blogs.  I find your opinions and comments thought-provoking and often entertaining.  I don't think you qualify as a troll, and hardly an idiot.  Perhaps you've said some things that qualify as idiotic, but I think everyone has a few of those.

Probably the stupidest thing I ever said was something along the lines of "anyone who reads a book is an idiot when you can just watch the movie."  At least I was probably around 12 when I said it.

I wouldn't call you a "jerk" either, but certainly opinionated and confrontational, which I'm sure people who confront you would consider "jerky".  I've even called out a couple of times when I thought you might've been a little over the top.  A comment you made about Ted Kennedy came to mind although in all honestly, I didn't necessarily disagree, either.

All that being said, I don't have a problem with JakilaTheHun, either.  I didn't realize the history you two had, but I do find him quite inciteful as well, just on different subject matter.

And kudos for your Simpsons reference.  Now let's all go out for some frosty chocolate milkshakes.

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#13) On November 21, 2009 at 11:52 AM, Bays (29.16) wrote:


Always enjoy reading your blogs.  Loved the Mr. Burns reference.


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#14) On November 21, 2009 at 12:16 PM, 100ozRound (28.63) wrote:


but I do find him quite inciteful as well

Can you clarify what you mean?

incite - provoke or stir up

insight -  The act or outcome of grasping the inward or hidden nature of things or of perceiving in an intuitive manner

Gotta be careful these days..... ;)

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#15) On November 21, 2009 at 12:45 PM, kdakota630 (29.06) wrote:

Oops.  Did I use the wrong synonym?  I'm usually so careful with those.

On the plus side, at least I know someone's actually reading my comments, and carefully.  LOL!

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#16) On November 21, 2009 at 1:14 PM, ease1 (97.11) wrote:

Another slap fight here.   Your dialog to the effect of:

Why is this idiot still talking? I can't drink Jack Daniels fast enough to make sense of this nonsense.

How do I tell people that I have lost my inner monologue?

David is Trashed in Qatar

Entertaining, Yes! Insightful, Yes! Inspiring, Absolutely!!!!

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#17) On November 21, 2009 at 3:38 PM, binve (< 20) wrote:

David, excellent post man. I can definitely understand where you are coming from. +10 if I could for the post. +100 for the quality Simpson's reference :)

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#18) On November 21, 2009 at 4:36 PM, oldfashionedway (34.02) wrote:

BravoBevo  #9)

I'm familiar with the concept of "turning the other cheek", but man, that's a harsh video link, dude.

That's not a veiled reference to the the Sermon on the Mount (Matt. 5:39), is it?  ;-)



The "Simpsons" quote was enjoyable, as are most of your posts.

  " is just how far we have to fall..."   I'm Not Alright   Sanctus Real 


Keep on blogging everybody, it's cheap entertainment!

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#19) On November 21, 2009 at 5:51 PM, DaretothREdux (50.88) wrote:


I think I peed a little after reading your anchorman quote using my name!

I also, forgot to compliment you on the "drunk ramblings" the other day. Especially, the "have you seen the light?" one...f-in' brilliant.


P.S. Congratz on 27 recs on a Saturday!

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#20) On November 21, 2009 at 6:59 PM, AltData (32.02) wrote:

Enjoy your blogs. Keep it up.

Be careful. The Secret Service is always looking for good bullet stoppers.

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#21) On November 21, 2009 at 7:41 PM, ChrisGraley (28.61) wrote:


Love the story.

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#22) On November 21, 2009 at 9:12 PM, whereaminow (< 20) wrote:


Thanks again for the recs and support. LOL, it's good to know that I can some really idiotic things and still not lose my "fan base." :) Perhaps I should comment drunk more often.

KDakota, thanks for the analysis. I (and everyone I know) agree with just about everything you said.

The Simpsons quote is from one of my fav early episodes: Burns' Heir

A couple of other memorable quotes from that episode:

Homer: (After the kids fail in the audition) Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is.... never try....

Mr. Burns: (After Bart trashes his statues) Look at that Smithers, a child of pure malevolance. He's the perfect one to suckle at my proverbial teat.

Homer: (Attempting to get Bart back from Mr. Burns' mansion) What are you going to do now? Release the hounds? Or the bees? Or the hounds with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you? ... What?... He slammed the door in my face!

David in Qatar

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#23) On November 21, 2009 at 9:39 PM, whereaminow (< 20) wrote:

Oh and just to clarify, I don't really have a problem with anyone I've ever gotten into a slap fight on Fool

(that list is growing now that I think about it)





dudemonkey (that one was especially hilarious since he was trying to agree with me and I still kept calling him retarded)





That's probably only 10% of the people I've offended at some point here.

This post is my personal fav. It contains the Ted Kennedy gem that KDakota was referring to:

"or any reference to that sociopathic scum bag that thankfully kicked the bucket last week, and is absolutely burning in Hell if there is one"

David in Qatar

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#24) On November 21, 2009 at 11:33 PM, 100ozRound (28.63) wrote:

David - they're just butthurt; have them fill out this form and send it to the caps moderators.....



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#25) On November 22, 2009 at 3:51 PM, 1315623493 wrote:

I am financialmodeler, lol. Don't maintain it anymore.

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#26) On November 22, 2009 at 6:01 PM, lucas1985 (< 20) wrote:

That's probably only 10% of the people I've offended at some point here."

Ohh, I don't feel offended at all. If anything, your insane "arguments" and straight copy/pasting from help me to practice fact recalling, perfect my information searching skills and improve my written English (which is very poor as everyone can see)
If a random dude on the Internet can offend me, I've got a serious problem.

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#27) On November 23, 2009 at 6:38 AM, XMFSinchiruna (26.55) wrote:

My Rec is for your wife, and mine ... for putting up with us. :)

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#28) On November 23, 2009 at 8:07 AM, lemoneater (56.79) wrote:

Real men love and appreciate their wives. :)

P.S. I thought trolls were lumpy brown dolls with hot pink hair?

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#29) On November 23, 2009 at 11:22 AM, nzsvz9 (< 20) wrote:


Your mother is a hamster and your father smells of elderberries.

Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time!

Keep posting.

Known as silly english knight nzsvz9

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#30) On November 23, 2009 at 11:47 AM, chk999 (99.96) wrote:

David, keep blogging!

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#31) On November 25, 2009 at 5:23 PM, djkumquat (36.90) wrote:

excellent! i especially liked that the funny story included not just Bil but Ocar as well. extra funny points!

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