Define your stock market strategy.
Ok, some of you are unsure what strategy to use, so I've put together a list with definitions so you can see what fits you best.
Day Trader- A trader that winds up broke after the first day.
Chartist- I guy that runs to his computer every time he sees a head and shoulders commercial.
CANSLIM- A trader that thinks his portfolio is too fat.
Buy and Hold- A trader that refuses to use the restroom until after the market closes.
Contrarian- A trader that argues with the other traders that say he "just got lucky".
Value investor- A trader that orders his stocks off the 99 cent menu.
Bull - It's what a trader tells you he made off a stock, not what he actually made.
Hedge fund manager- A guy making millions of dollars that used to make $7.50 an hour doing landscaping.
Broker- A guy that gets richer by making you broker.
Broker- Helps invest money for a retirement plan. His.
Analyst- A guy that helps you plan for what already happened.
Margin- The place on the contract where the fine print is located. A broker points to it after he takes all your money.
Options- What you had before you sold those naked calls.
Market timer - First guy to tell you that the perfect time to buy anything is yesterday.
Dow Jones- What you get after Dow Chemical goes up 80%
That's all I could think of, feel free to add more.