Exxon Mobil has more profits than ever before!
Exxon made $11.7B last quarter, and $40.6B last year, more than they're ever made before.
April Fools! Actually, because XOM's earnings were calculated using the rapidly devaluing "U.S. Dollar," their profits are actually smaller than they were in the past. So when congressmen talk about Exxon Mobil's obscene profits, think about who's stealing the value of the dollars used to pay for gasoline (in addition to taking a more forthright cut), resulting in truly obscene profits.