Fake News: Pres. Obama demands Ron Paul style Poll Scamming
*Fake News* President Barack Obama has announced another bailout program. This one is about his own polling numbers. "What we need to do is to get all those who helped push Ron Paul's numbers on during the Republican Primary Race on Internet and Phone polling agencies to help me out here.... Help me out here guys...uh.... My Health Care numbers are below 50. So...Just like you mass e-mailed and mass blogged to get people to flood Republiacn Primary Polls for Ron Paul, I need you to do the same for my Presidential Approval Numbers for Health Care reform.
And while your at it... I need some help with my own overall Presidential Job Approval numbers.... Now now.. I know what your thinking.... Your thinking this is about me.... Please... This was always about me! I mean...I need to win re-election in 2012.... I can't do that with Gallup showing that only 59% of Americans approve of me when 72% approved of me on Innuaguration day...
I need some artificial inflationary poll scamming from the Ron Paulian crowd... So go out there and make a sacrifice for your President. After you're done doing that maybe you can help me repair my Teleprompter.
You see...uh... My approval numbers started slipping ever since my Teleprompter broke. If I fix it then I'll know what to say in these Pre-Rehersed Press Conferences so as to make Americans FAWN and DROOL over me... Let's face it... People don't like me for my looks.... They like me for my teleprompt speech making....So...Uh....What do you say Ron Paulians??"