Fake SIRI news out today
Sirius XM has just announced their new CEO and ticker symbol.
Sirius XM will now trade under ticker symbol (BABY) and Chief Executive Officer Justin Bieber will be at the helm.
Assisting Justin Bieber as Vice CEO will be disgraced former JC Penny CEO Ron Johnson.
Ron Johnson issued a statement stating, "It will be a pleasure learning from Justin Bieber how to attract a customer base since Justin has grown 37.5 million Twitter followers by using an electronic algorithym."
Justin's first order of business since the Board of Directors appointed him was to change Sirius XM's ticker symbol. But, he promises shares will still trade on E-BAY.
Also, he has issued a second directive to initiate a new channel on Sirius XM.
The "Justin Bieber Fan Channel", channel 222, will broadcast nothing but Justin Bieber tunes, interviews, and 13 year old girl screaming contests.
Justin also will let Ron Johnson continue to write and mail out letters that don't say anything specific, but instead ramble on and on and on to Sirius XM customers about "The upcoming changes" to Sirius XM.
Finally, a channel devoted to Trash Talking against the Paparazzi will debut this Summer... Justin himself will host the morning hours 5:00 AM to 9:00 AM.
"I'm excited about the opportunity to show everyone what I REALLY think about the annoying, *&^% photographers and crappy journalists getting in my face all the time!!!!!! *&^%" Justin said to us over the phone louder than we expected.
And that's the FAKE NEWS....Thank you for listening in on a WXYB and an S news report!