How about robo-CEOs?
October 15, 2010
– Comments (7)
Wall Street executives have shown to us that in their opinion, anyone can be a foreclosure expert. While many bloggers misspend their anger pointing out that untrained robo-signer hair stylists may not make the best foreclosure experts, I have a much better suggestion.
Let us accept Wall Street's idea that anyone who runs temperature of 98.6 degrees is capable of shuffling legal papers. And then let's make the next step by suggesting that borrowing money at 0% from the Fed to buy short-term treasury bonds yielding 1% cannot be more complicated than learning the meaning of "affidavit", "complaint", and "personal property". Then we could save some serious money if we realize there is no point in paying $20.3 Billion in bonuses to the best and the brightest on Wall Street when their duties might as well be performed by hair stylists.
So my suggestion is to relieve Brian Moynihan, Jamie Dimon, and Lloyd Blankfein from their current banking jobs. They are overqualified. It's a crime to use such bright people for such routine clerical tasks. These intellectual titans really belong to a research lab at Harvard University where they would be able to realize their full potential by studying experimental properties of two-dimensional graphene. And then let us hire a few robo-CEOs to put the executive tasks on autopilot.
I think we can find some at RiteAid around the next corner.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/10/13/meet-banks-robosigners-fo_n_761698.html
"In depositions released Tuesday, many of those workers testified that they barely knew what a mortgage was. Some couldn't define the word "affidavit." Others didn't know what a complaint was, or even what was meant by personal property. Most troubling, several said they knew they were lying when they signed the foreclosure affidavits and that they agreed with the defense lawyers' accusations about document fraud.
The mortgage servicers hired people who would never question authority," said Peter Ticktin, a Deerfield Beach, Fla., lawyer who is defending 3,000 homeowners in foreclosure cases. As part of his work, Ticktin gathered 150 depositions from bank employees who say they signed foreclosure affidavits without reviewing the documents or ever laying eyes on them -- earning them the name "robo-signers."The deposed employees worked for the mortgage service divisions of banks such as Bank of America and JP Morgan Chase, as well as for mortgage servicers like Litton Loan Servicing, a division of Goldman Sachs. "