I AM OFFICIALLY AWESOME
30 points up, the day's hottest player. Who's dumb now? How about everyone else on CAPS!
If everyone would stop looking at stupid stuff like balance sheets and earnings, they could all ride this gravy train with me! It's all cash money from here on out!
Here are my secrets to success, to all those losers out there who want to drop their loser portfolios and get in on my one way trip to the top:
1. Don't listen to anyone who claims to "know something about the stock market". Go with your gut. Who's to say what stock is worth more than some other stock? They are all just pieces of paper.
2. It's all in the name. Does the company have part of some good word in their name? If so, it propably has whatever good thing the name suggests. Some made up examples: ValueCom. This sounds like a company with good value. IntegriTech. This sounds like a company with integrity. Don't buy anything that has a boring name like Altria, Toyota, or Nokia. All of those companies sound made up and will probably not be around in a few years.
3. Low Price = Good Value. Why pay $500 for some stock when you can get one for under $2? That makes no sense. If you could buy a can of Coke for $500 or a can of Pepsi for $2, I would pick Pespsi even though Pepsi tastes like Coke that someone filtered through a gym sock.
With those tips in mind, go out there and make some money! And if you do, don't forget to send me a check for 10% of the profit!