If They IPO, I Will Short It
As I mentioned in a previous blog, I try out different new fast food places to see if I can find another winner like Roy Rogers Hamburgers. In this quest I've seen (and eaten) things ranging from the excellent through the insipid.
Today's review is about a place that I not only won't be buying the IPO, I'll be shorting it. With borrowed money.
The place is called V.G. Burgers and I ate in the original (and as far as I know only) location. They are a vegan fast food place that sells stuff made with soy, hemp and other vegetarian ingredients. (The ice cream analog is made with hemp, but I was assured it would not cause positive drug test reactions.) They have a website and seem to have dreams of organic fast food dominance, but frankly magic 8 ball says "looks unlikely".
Now I was a vegetarian during the devoian period, so I decided to go two different times and try two different things that looked appealing to give them a fair shake as a restaurant.
On the first visit I tried the fries. Now I really like good french fries, and potatoes are vegetarian, so I had high hopes. As I entered, visions of heaping portions of crispy Idaho goodness danced in my head. What I got was frozen institutional fries heated in a convection oven. And then mixed with the cold ones from the holding tray. And at $3 for a small paper container. This made them not only mediocre minus, but dang expensive.
For the second (and last ever) visit I decided to try the Italian "Meatball" sandwich. (Yes, they have the quotes in the menu.) It turned out to be three smallish (and tasteless) soy balls on a whole wheat hotdog roll covered in the most insipid marinara I've eaten in years. And yes, this concoction was very expensive at $4. (I was still so hungry I had to go over to Taco Bell to get some crunchy tacos. By comparison, TB was ambrosia.) While I ate it I perused a magazine on green living. If this place is the future, I'm burrowing back into the past.
So there you have it. Tiny portions, uninspiring taste and wackingly high prices.
I'm going to vote with my feet and go elsewhere.
I was the only one there during my last visit (during the dinner hour) so I think
others are voting with their feet too. This is a very vegitarian friendly town, so if they can't make it here, they can't make it anywhere. (Que the MTM theme song music.)