New Shyster Capital CAPS Profile & 1st Post

DJoshuaRubin — Mon, 19 Dec 2011 13:37:45 GMT

Hey Fools,

I have decided ShysterCapital needs its own profile on CAPS. You can find it here.

Also, we have posted our first research report. A humble piece entitled, Netflix Will Soar Past $1,000 Per Share. You can find it

Exmovere, A Jackpot For Investors?

DJoshuaRubin — Sat, 17 Dec 2011 11:56:10 GMT

Exmovere Holdings has an awe-inspiring invention to help amputees and people who have lost the use of their legs. I see their product (see video below), "The Chariot" as a potential blockbuster, with a very real chance of expanding beyond people with disabilities into the general public, serving the much larger section of the population: the generally lazy bastard.

One of the sectors I am very intere...

Tim Tebow Rules

DJoshuaRubin — Sat, 17 Dec 2011 08:49:38 GMT

Hey Fools,

Just thinking about how truly awesome Tim Tebow is.

1. He has created the feeling that God is on his side.

2. He wins more with heart and charisma than talent.

3. He has a very public charity. It does both good for the world and strengthens his status.

Hey Fools,

Gaming Fools - and I know there's many - when I play FIFA 12 against my pal in LA (The Duke of Wall Street) our games often have "skipping" in the action. And at times the players seem to be moving through slow motion time warps.

How do we know - a) which guy is skipping or b) is it an EA server thing? and c) if I was stupid enough to spend more money o...

Bob Pittman is No One-Eyed Jackass

DJoshuaRubin — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 12:08:58 GMT

Fools,

Daniel Gross interviews Michelle Leder of Footnoted.Com. I am so excited to create Shyster Capital Management, because at the end of the day you really are either a shyster or a sucker. And I'm a shyster. Shyster ...

Putting the Honesty Back in Dishonesty

DJoshuaRubin — Mon, 12 Dec 2011 06:57:28 GMT

Fools,

Thanks for the help with my brand management. Last post on this issue.

After meditating for 32 hours without food or water, a rainbow-assed baboon lead me on a space-unicorn butt naked to Ultimate Truth, who appeared in the form of a humorless talking banana. U.T. told me 10 visions would appear to me and then I'd know our name.

Th...

Old Ladies Ruin Perfectly Good Scam

DJoshuaRubin — Fri, 09 Dec 2011 10:15:39 GMT

Fools,

This is a great article from the cover of this week's Bloomberg Businessweek Magazine by Felix Gillette.

Genius opening paragraph.

Fools,

Our experts have just concluded a comprehensive consumer research report. It has come to my attention that our branding is flawed. These results caught us all off guard.

We polled 4100 consumers looking to purchase financial products and found:

In terms of confidence, the name Shyster Capital Management ranked either "low"...

How I'm Making Money Now

DJoshuaRubin — Tue, 06 Dec 2011 15:46:10 GMT

Hey Fools,

I get a lot of email from people asking how I'm making money now. Here's a guide:

Long gold 'til mid-Spring, then shorting it. But only for profit.

Watching interest rates to see if they move.

Long special opportunities - currently buying up Action Jackso...

10 Steps to Becoming a Master Investor

DJoshuaRubin — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 12:48:29 GMT

To be a master you must look like a master. To look like a master you must post lists of what it takes to be a master. Here's 10 steps to becoming a Master Investor.

1. Invest in stocks that appreciate in value. Simple but not easy.

2. Work hard. It's not in style, but it was true when Thomas Jefferson bought...

The Blividian Group Celebrates Dropping Two

DJoshuaRubin — Wed, 23 Nov 2011 11:06:17 GMT

Press Release - November 23, 2011 - 9:54 a.m. - Chicago, Illinois

The Blividian Group - a leading collection of well-known companies with crap-like qualities - proudly celebrates two brilliant calls.

We are closing our short calls on both Pandora (Nasdaq: P) and Groupon (Nasdaq: GRPN).

These ca...

Shyster Capital Management Presents New Tagline

DJoshuaRubin — Fri, 18 Nov 2011 10:11:33 GMT

Fools,

To get to the top, you have to issue Press Releases. You have to dominate the news cycle. You have to be clinically insane enough to believe that everything you do is newsworthy.

This brilliant boo...

A Giant Red Apple Flag

DJoshuaRubin — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 09:52:48 GMT

Fools,

As the Chief Executive Officer and Chairman of the Board of my new company - working title, Shyster Capital Management, I have been formulating a vision. A purpose. A raison d'etre. And that is simplicity. To bring simplicity into investing. I love simple things. Like hot buttered bagels. Club soda. And underpants.

I read the Steve Jobs biography. And like eve...

Tap This Ice Cold Monster of Greatness

DJoshuaRubin — Tue, 15 Nov 2011 11:50:24 GMT

Fools,

I am proud to add MolsonCoors (NYSE: TAP) to The Monsters of Greatness Fund.

Well Coors, not Molson. Screw Molson. Canada can kiss my arse.

This pick is about American ingenuity, innovation and most importantly to me - A Shyster - it's about marketing. Coors, more than any product in world history, has stuck to its messag...

Buffett Ups Stake in Monster of Greatness

DJoshuaRubin — Mon, 14 Nov 2011 09:37:16 GMT

Fools,

I have read Buffett.

I have studied Buffett.

Buffett has billions and billions of dollars. And he's giving much of it away to better the world.

Buffett is a good man.

I am a good man. Because I claim to have read Buffett I am a smart man too.

The Steve Jobs Bio

DJoshuaRubin — Sun, 13 Nov 2011 04:39:15 GMT

He was himself x 1,000. For better and worse. The better outweighed the worse by an infinite degree.

He studied Zen Buddhism, and his ability to avoid distraction and focus entirely on his current project was his greatest strength.

He believed in the power of intuition.

He believed in the value of mind-enhancing experience, like tr...

Netflix, A Future Marketing Piece

DJoshuaRubin — Sat, 12 Nov 2011 13:01:01 GMT

Fools,

Please do not read this post. It's private, written solely to develop a marketing piece for my twin funds, The Monsters of Greatness and The Blividian Group, in the second half of 2012.

Netflix. Our research indicates that subscriber growth rates will increase, international expansion will be adopted quicker than anti...

Key Metric

DJoshuaRubin — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 14:58:38 GMT

Fools,

With four recs on my last post, one of them mine, it's clear that many of you are fascinated with my new CAPS portfolio.

Because i believe strongly that dispensing advice makes me feel smarter, I will share with you a metric I use to pick market-thrashing stocks. It's called The New Sonny BM Test. It works like this. I imagine it's the future, and my daughter tells me...

M.O.G. Fund Backs Time Warner's Bewkes

DJoshuaRubin — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 09:36:01 GMT

Fools, Countrymen - Lend Me Your Rears,

The Monsters of Greatness Fund - the most important consquence-free global investment vehicle Earth has ever seen - is issuing a proclamation.

We support Jeff Bewkes' plans for Time Warner, Inc.

This Research Report, normally valued at $21.12 is yours free.

CAPSmosphere,

The Monsters of Greatness Fund - the fastest rising star in the consequence-free fund world - and arch rival of Whitney Tilson - has something to say.

We are upping our love of Google, Inc. (Nasdaq: GOOG). This New York Times

DJoshuaRubin's Blog

New Shyster Capital CAPS Profile & 1st Post

Exmovere, A Jackpot For Investors?

Tim Tebow Rules

Bob Pittman is No One-Eyed Jackass

Putting the Honesty Back in Dishonesty

Old Ladies Ruin Perfectly Good Scam

How I'm Making Money Now

10 Steps to Becoming a Master Investor

The Blividian Group Celebrates Dropping Two

Shyster Capital Management Presents New Tagline

A Giant Red Apple Flag

Tap This Ice Cold Monster of Greatness

Buffett Ups Stake in Monster of Greatness

The Steve Jobs Bio

Netflix, A Future Marketing Piece

Key Metric

M.O.G. Fund Backs Time Warner's Bewkes