The Morning Dump
December 09, 2008
– Comments (5) |
RELATED TICKERS: EPG
, KKD
, GM
A Car Czar. This sounds so completely stupid. According to this NY Times article, "Car Czar" is the unofficial name given to the “one or more officers” expected to fill the job of overseer to the auto industry.
And what are the job qualifications the Government is looking for? According to the NY Times the legislation actually calls for someone with “appropriate expertise in such areas as economic stabilization, financial aid to commerce and industry, financial restructuring, energy efficiency and environmental protection”. Sounds impressive.
And what is the job description? To quote the Times “The car czar would also have the power to convene meetings of an array of interested parties in the auto companies, including unions, creditors, suppliers, auto dealers and shareholders”. Sounds awesome.
I have a better job title. I say we call it the Office of the Know-it-all Butt-inski. That title covers both parts. And why should I make fun of such an important oversight position? Because besides making sure donuts get to his meetings, Mr. Know-it -all Butt-inski has the authority to “demand repayment of the emergency loans” should the companies fail to submit long term reorganization plans by March 31st.
Dear NY Times. Thanks for the in depth analysis.
Dear Congress, if you have to lend them this money, because they desperately need to spend it right now, it will not be there in March if you want it back. So make sure the guy you appoint is good at choosing donuts, because that is all he is going to do besides calling a few meetings and giving you someone to complain about for not doing their job.
Just make the decision. Lend or do not lend. You can pretend you can control how they spend the cash, but you cannot. If you insist they spend it in the USA and they want to spend money in Africa, they will just shift other moneys there. Think SSI if you cannot figure out how.
You can say they have made bad decisions, everybody else does. But compared to Wagoner, you do not know diddly about the car business. That is why he testified and you listened. And based upon the crap you are legislating, I think he did the better job.
If you want warrants, go for it. Set your interest rate. But do not pretend you can run a car company.
Shares of EPG, converters of BS into saleable products, are expected to crash with this load of crap being dumped on the markets.
Shares of KKD, converters of dough into pastrys, are expected to rise on the increased number of meetings.