The Poop: Hacked
December 17, 2008
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I had hoped to be able to write The Poop at least once each day, but I found that spell checking, fact checking (Which matters for a report on BS?), hunt and peck typing, and the general dispensing of The Poop to take more time than I had thought it would. Also I failed to find any new crap inspirational. Essentially, I crapped out.
So to those of you who post every day, especially to those who post original work, I would like to pay my sincere respects for your ability to flush the crap out of our daily news services each day. The ability to dump a regular load each morning is truly something for which we are all thankful.
As I read more and more posts listing the ways the USA got into trouble, my concerns turned to how we should get out of trouble. Having established that the problem is (warning: BS alert ) clogged credit markets (phew, glad that BS is behind us) the easiest solution I thought would be to unclog them. Some sort of credit market Draino is needed, something that could be put into the credit markets, like lye into a toilet. The solution I thought, is dollars. They are cheap, and sink to the bottom where the clog is. Of course then I realized this "flushing" plan had already failed. $350bil dollars has been sunk into the problem and not unclogged anything. Many seem to think trying again is a good idea, with $350bil more dollars.
What these people fail to realize, is that credit markets are clogged with a different kind of crap. A special crap that cannot be just flushed away like dollars. Credit is not real. It is imaginary. It is hope. BS of course is real, and can be used over and over but credit cannot. And therein lies the problem. Because it is not real, it requires an unreal solution. Obviously.
Because linquistics matter, once credit is created it must then be called debt, and it is the debt which is nothing, and yet must be flushed away. As credit it was a thing of value, something desirable to have. Sought after BS if you will. As debt it is a horrible nightmare, crap spread everywhere, in the banks, on the reports, on the books just mucking the place up.
The solution to getting rid of all this debt is to leave the door unlocked. As we know people will steal your credit, or any other crap that you do not lock down. We learned today that MSFT has left the crap door open. We can be hacked. If a qualified hacker were to break into the debt vault, and steal all the debt, it would be gone. It had value as credit, so it must have value as debt. Or at least we must be able to convince someone that it does. And we are good at BS aren't we. As an expert BS watchdog I am emminently qualified to handle this problem. For a small fee, payable in gold, I will spread the BS that this debt has value. Once convinced, a hacker with just a few clicks on a keyboard will steal it. Then just as the credit left and became debt, when the debt leaves credit will return. And we have to hurry or this guy will steal all the banks debts first and we will miss our chance to get it all.
Shares of EPG, converter of BS into saleable products, remain unimpressed.