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With apologies to The Bard



April 12, 2007 – Comments (5)

When fabulous Fool editor Carrie "Miss Bitty" Crocket reminded her stable of stock scribblers that it's National Poetry Month, the work started pouring in via one of those office email trails. It's too good not to share.

(These weren't deemed worthy of the front page, so only 5 or 6 of you will have your day brightened by our collective Poetry might.)

For your reading pleasure, I figured I'd crib from the email chain and present you with some Foolish NPM speed poetry. The first round featured: Google (Nasdaq: GOOG), Viacom (NYSE: VIA), Yahoo! (Nasdaq: YHOO), Apple (Nasdaq: AAPL), Sohu (Nasdaq: SOHU), Amazon (Nasdaq: AMZN) and (Nasdaq: OSTK).

Round two (listed first below) was Haiku about Whole Foods Markets (Nasdaq: WFMI), Apple (Nasdaq: AAPL), Urban Outfitters (Nasdaq: URBN) and angry message-board posters.

By Carrie Crockett

Urban Outfitters
So edgy and so well-priced
One-stop wardrobe shop

Whole Paycheck sells out
What’s organic now? What’s not?
Still better than Schnuck’s

By Nathan Alderman

Montlies r just shirt!!!!1!!!
Tryin 2 get you’re shares cheep
LOL, looser.

Haiku by Nathan Alderman:

Google is evil
CEO sold all his shares
Avoid, Fools, avoid

By Seth Jayson

Crazy iFans cheer
Though fancy TV box blurs
Does it matter, Steve?

Tanka from Carrie Crockett

Dissed by Viacom,
caught stealing code in China,
outdone by Sohu,

copyright infringement suits…
Is this any way to act?

Tanka by Anders Blyland

Advantage seems lost
Amazon Unboxed, iTunes
Total Access, too

Undeterred, unfazed, upbeat
Pilgrim leads into the breach

Limericks by Seth Jayson and Mac Greer, who asks if you can tell where he began to struggle:

A scion of GEICO from Utah
Yelled "You'd never believe it if you saw...
These Sith Lords and shorts
Are criminal sorts.
With Dad's dollars I hope to buy new law."

Once great Yahoo! had struggles with search
It was knocked from its once mighty perch
As Google excelled
Old school yahoo was felled
Because of its inability to respond to Google's contextual advertising solution...


Got a stock-infested poem inside that's itching to break out? Add it here. 

At the time of publication, Seth Jayson had no positions in any company mentioned here. View his stock holdings and Fool profile here. Whole Foods, Amazon, and Yahoo! are, IIRC, Stock Advisor recommendations. Fool rules are here


5 Comments – Post Your Own

#1) On April 12, 2007 at 1:48 PM, TMFBent (99.27) wrote:

Carrie points out that the first mention of her name contains a typo which shortchanges here of Ts. Her name is more properly spelled: Crockettttt.

(I included some extras in case I whiff on it again.)

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#2) On April 12, 2007 at 1:51 PM, TMFLucky11 (99.81) wrote:

These are excellent.  I nominate Bent for Foolish Poet Laureate!

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#3) On April 12, 2007 at 2:21 PM, XMFBittybumble (< 20) wrote:

Hey! I have always fancied MYSELF Foolish Poet Laureate.

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#4) On April 12, 2007 at 3:52 PM, TMFBent (99.27) wrote:

I smell a contest brewing.

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#5) On April 13, 2007 at 8:15 AM, TMFBent (99.27) wrote:

I'm a complete tool. I got Anders' name wrong too. It's Anders Bylund.

Note to self: give editors less work to do...


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